Jyllinge Jelly Babies

You are so terribly naughty, it's so long since any of you last visited your favourite sexy fun girl Mandy. But I'm thrilled because so much has happened since the first installment of Jyllinge and I just can't wait to tell you about it. But oh fiddle sticks, silly Mandy, I've forgotten it all. Oh well, help yourself to the champagne. I shouldn't drink so much really but with such a lively bubbly personality the doctor told me I should consume at least one bottle a day. Anyway that's my excuse. Hee! Besides it's so boring waiting here for Chris with nothing to do all day, he never seems to visit us or brings me sexy little gifts any more. And it's been awfully hot all summer sunbathing on the lawn in the one little spot where passers by can catch fleeting glimpses of me from the street. I have to keep finding even more ridiculously tiny itsy-bitsy bikinis to keep them peering over the wall. For instance look at this bikini it's hardly worth wearing it. Oh dear, silly me, I forgot to put it on. You won't peep will you. Hee Hee! Anyway there certainly have been changes here at Jyllinge since you last came and we have some great new girls like Karen from Crosby and Greta from Grozny. The most significant news though is that Utta and Una, our horrible so-called fetish police found three new followers called Nutter, Stutter and Engird at the Berlin Love Parade. Chris was furious when he dropped in and discovered the little gang had in his absence clad all his beautiful girls in shiny PVC and rubber. They looked so miserable too it reminded him of one of those huge over-hyped fetish parties where one paid a fortune to get in just to act like well behaved mannequins parading their over priced tat. It was so hot sticky and uncomfortable in there for Mandy too, and all she had agreed to do in this strip was to strip when required and preferably when Chris is around. He has such a lovely body too you know, and such a pretty little bum I could just kiss it. Oh Mandy shut up will you, they probably think you just fancy him because he's our creator. Oh holy orgasms, I bet he'll read this. I so hope not! Anyway I do hope he's thinking of me. But if he isn't, why not? Jan and Becky The Surrealistic Non-Religeous Nuns won't miss Nutter and Stutter though, or Engird. All they ever wanted to do was to lead a peaceful life picking flowers in the gardens and to study Chris's drawings but instead they were forced to go out flashing their tits for beads in Orleans. It was a complete waste of time anyway for they thought they were going to New Orleans. And they were made to ride noisy scooters around Montreaux and Vevey swearing and grabbing handbags. If it wasn't that it was playing chicken blindfold on the mountain railway. Chris didn't like that at all, and I'm pleased to say any horrid fetish gang members who still remain have been made to wear tight little French maids outfits all day as a punishment. Okay some of you might not think that is really much of a punishment at all, as I know only too well some naughty boys who absolutely adore cross-dressing for Mandy. They might like painting her toenails and sucking them too for a smacked bottom but I'm sure they wouldn't fancy doing all that horrible nasty cleaning as well. You might think I'm joking but those girls have to lick the toilets clean and polish the seat with their bums. Oh yes, that is what I wanted to tell you! As matters were quickly getting out of hand here at Jyllinge and it was quickly turning to anarchy Chris thought he had better invent a new strong character, the formidable Useka. She was brought in to keep order and she is certainly well qualified for the job as she is a former Bond Girl. Yes she was one of the drop-dead sexy but lethal action girls the double-zeros had to contend with from I think that organization called S.K.O.D.A. She escaped here after the old Soviet empire tumbled and the Bond writers didn't want her in their stories either as she might kill off their handsome 007's on the very first page, and especially so as they are only stupid actors. Hee Hee. I think it would have been a likely outcome too as she had already dispatched Double-Zero-One to Double-Zero-Six. I can believe it as well, all the girls here are simply terrified of her. She keeps letting out little things from her secret past like how she always had to strangle her discarded boyfriends because they knew too much. Little things like what perfume she wore and which was her favourite Vodka. During the hard times in Russia she couldn't afford nice clothes or the little luxuries of life and still prides herself on being an ideological survivor. So without bothering with money she still manages to gatecrash the glitzy Bond Premieres looking a million dollars and wearing the sexiest outfits imaginable yet made solely out of traffic cones and strung together with bits of rope that fell off lorries. The last lot came off the M25 motorway near St. Albans and it caused an awful pileup. It even headlined in the newspapers here in Switzerland. But Useka didn't care, and when the tabloids asked 'Who Stole The Bloody Cones!' she wrote back and said it was her and she was really proud of it, the worthy Bond adversary and Green Warrior. She was so angry when they ignored her letter written in invisible ink and thinking they didn't answer because they might have thought she was seeking self-publicity, she screamed "Useka doesn't pull publicity stunts, only the head's off plonkers!" Anyway in readiness for the next Bond Premiere she has walked off with the bright yellow cones that stand beside the steps to the American White House in Washington. The little cheeky number she is busy riveting with her teeth still has 'Reserved for President' in big letters on the bottom. She jokes as she salutes herself in the mirror announcing it will be a nice place to keep her bush, but I can't understand what she means really as she shaves herself down there. Now you realizes why everyone is so terrified of her here; the perfect fearless woman anti-hero who could kill anybody or do anything. But I think it is just hilarious that everyone is so afraid of her, because your fearless heroine girl Mandy isn't: Anyway, not very. I even call her my little 'Minx from Minsk' as in my hands she's just a pussycat. She loves it so when I massage, tease, and thrill her muscular body with my expert fingers and tongue making all that tension stress and anger melt away. So not surprisingly after she has done her rounds in the early-hours she silently slips into bed with me and snuggles up really close and as I pleasure her she whispers softly nibbling my ear "It's a good job you're not a man, because I'd have to kill you for this." Yes, she's a sweet little assassin. Hee Hee. But it's a good job I always get to bed in time because she is so crazy about me she totally ignores the fact that I slip out through the little side gate when everyone else is fast asleep. New emergency rules here mean the girls have to stay at home now and can't go out in public as and when they feel like it, the way I do. So I feel if I wasn't there in the night for her when she really needed me she'd literally turn me into ' Randy Mandy-The Inflatable Doll' when I got back and make an example of me: And I'd really hate that, Hee Hee. The reason why we're no longer free to come and go any more is nothing to do with being so naughty, it's all to do with world terrorism as the Americans keep shooting down all our friends from outer-space. If you read the first installment you will still be wondering how a whole bunch of beautiful girls can roam naked and do as they please in a conservative country like Switzerland without being noticed even by the neighbors or even their cows. We only exist because Chris wants us to exist, dressing us and then removing our clothes. But believe it or not, that appeals to our little green alien friends from Dazarus. They come visiting once a month to trade our soiled knickers, and in exchange we use their technology which keeps our presence and activities totally secret beyond these closed gates. The poor Dazarus people have no smell of their own and our dirty undies are much sought after and relished for under their moonlight during the damp mating season they hang them up in their gardens and invite all their friends to an orgy as the whiff the garments give off induces a frenzy of uncontrollable deviant sexual activity. And if I didn't know you better my little play mates, Mandy would think you just see her as just another dumb blond strip girl, but she can answer one important question that none of your university clever-clogs can answer. Do we really exist and do we have souls? Silly me, coming to think of it, I don't know either so I'll have another sip or two of champagne. Besides, all this chatting has made me so dry. The interesting thing is that when the Dazarian people come down to Earth they are just invisible spirits like ghosts and because they are simple life forms compared to many of the other entities in apace they need to find a way to materialize. They tried everything but the only thing they could use as a host to take on the human appearance was cheese. And phew take it from me, not just any old cheese, it has to be those runny overripe pongy soft cheeses that make you wonder as you open the door whether that someone before you farted in the fridge. I have to say they smell horrible and it's hardly surprising my soiled pants smell like a breath of fresh air to them. They tried turning their souls in to a hard Swiss cheese too and although they didn't smell quite so bad they found they couldn't stop eating one another: Also when they ate food it just kept falling out of the holes. Apart from piles of our undies the other thing they just can't get enough of is a Swiss fruit toffee simply called a Sugu which they eat with the paper still on. But poor things, that might be because they have no arms when they come to Earth. They are so precious they have to leave them at home, and sometimes there is just one pair of hands to feed a whole family. Maybe that is the reason why they evolved to become invisible for they are totally defenseless. Their other means of protection is they always cover their tracks as they can erase the memory of anyone they encounter. This they do by secreting a potion in their skin. So yes with a little help from our cheesy green friends we over-sexed Jyllinge girls have slept our way through most of the beautiful men and women in Europe and beyond without you lower life forms ever knowing. All you know in the morning or after you've finished your pint is is that you've just had a wonderful wonderful wet dream. Of course the Dazarian people are not that smart or perceptive either and we couldn't sell on their crackpot Dazarian technology. We heard of a another planet not too far away which asked them to find some nice little homely fluffy house pets to keep the old people company and they returned with hundreds of angry belching camels which believed they were Formula One racing cars and spent the whole day racing one another around the old people's houses snarling, hissing, and knocking over the furniture whilst a Secretary Bird gave a running commentary. The pensioners have also been having terrible nightmares about what the traveling Bedouins say they will do with their rapiers when they find out who robbed them of their livelihood, and then there are those furious racing drivers who've found their stubborn cars won't go as they have a mind of their own. Hee Hee! And we have had our embarrassing moments too when girls went out believing they were invisible to normal humans but were not and got arrested and charged, or worse still exploding on trams and in bars. I know it's not funny as it could happen to any one of us including your fun girl Mandy, but I'd love to see someone's face after they had bought a beautiful girl a sparkling little cocktail and as she takes her first sip and their eyes meet she explodes with a huge bang. Of course 'James Bond' would ask in a dry voice "Was it something I said?" But unfortunately you humans are not that witty either and the poor chap would get thrown out by the bouncers for letting off stink bombs for do those girls stink when they go POP! But that only ever happened because they ate too many of the specially prepared jelly babies which the Dazarian people so generously supply us with to perform their magic. The secret is not to eat the coloured ones. Yes, as I said. Hee Hee, when a girl does burst the smell is dreadful, and it would completely ruin your date too! Sorry, I can't stop giggling. That happened to smarty-pants Ruth. All I said was " Struth Ruth" and she went bang. And yes if you haven't already guessed it's always the pong of that awful runny cheese! I have a confession to make for when I'm really fed up and bored, or if I don't like somebody, I take very tiny nibbles of the different coloured jelly babies and I've found that I can annoy you people by making some terrible smells without actually bursting. So I just love to wander naked and unseen through the various parliament buildings of the world, infiltrating important committee and board meetings and especially those rooms where they have no windows to open. It's so hilarious looking at all those politicians and captains of industry as they try not to look at one another accusingly. Hee Hee, now you know why so many talks break down. See, your Mandy can be naughty in all sorts of ways. Anyway they deserve it too, they're just a load of pompous greedy overfed oafs, and that must be true as I bet they don't think about me Mandy, or the plight of starving artists like Chris. The Dazarian women look like concrete pill-boxes and so not surpringly we are celebrities in Dazdaz their capital and there are pin-up pictures of us hanging in all the homes. Unfortunately the Dazarian people don't have any nice colours on their planet and when the schoolchildren make their gifts of jelly babies they love to pour loads of colours in to the moulds and it's a pity nobody told them we only eat the clear ones. Now not only do we have more than enough jelly babies to last a human lifetime we can't eat them and we simply don't know what to do with them all either for they literally fill up the coal hole, cellar and even the septic tank. Hee Hee, I just hope the electricity man never comes for not only would Chris get a massive bill they would have to excavate to find the meter. At least we would all have time to hide though, there are now so many jelly babies under the house it wobbles each time someone comes up the drive. We are slowly getting rid of them though. Heidi has even sewn then into her mattress and made a super bouncy but sticky jelly baby water bed, and when we can go out the girls even hide them in their underclothes and secretly sprinkle them down the street as they go along. But those days of freedom and fun have come to an abrupt end as our little funny friends from Dazarus haven't been at all this year as the stupid Americans now shoot down anything in the skies that doesn't belong to them, even friendly UFO's full of jelly babies. I'm afraid it's a case of jelly babies everywhere but none to eat as the supply of good clear one's is almost exhausted too; and especially so as I keep stealing them so that I can slip out in the night. Hee Hee! Oh my God! I must have even eaten all the clear one's we've been keeping for emergencies. And this is an emergency! Useka will kill me when she finds out. At worst it will be Mandy R.I.P., and at best Mandy the Dart Board. I have to do something! Do you think I might explode if I just pop one slightly pink one in to my pretty little mouth instead? Here goes! xxxx